22 Japanese ways to say “Will you go out with me?”

Asking someone out in Japanese can be sweet, fun, and a little nerve-wracking. But don’t worry — there are plenty of warm and informal ways to say “Will you go out with me?” that fit different moods and relationships.

Whether you want to be straightforward, playful, or polite, these 22 expressions will help you find just the right words. Plus, understanding the nuances can make your approach feel more natural and genuine.

Learning these phrases is a great way to connect on a deeper level, especially if you’re interested in Japanese culture or dating someone who speaks the language.

This list will guide you through casual, polite, and native-like ways to ask that special question — and maybe even inspire your confidence to ask in person!

Knowing how to say it in different ways can also help you pick up on subtle cues when someone asks you out in Japanese.

Ready to find your perfect phrase? Let’s dive into 22 Japanese ways to say “Will you go out with me?” with easy pronunciation guides and little tips along the way.

Starting Your Language Journey

Before diving into the phrases, it’s helpful to get familiar with some basics of Japanese sentence structure and polite forms.

Japanese often uses context, tone, and subtle phrasing rather than direct questions. So, many ways to ask someone out can sound soft or indirect.

Getting comfortable with expressions related to invitations and feelings will make these phrases easier to remember and use.

Sometimes, having a handy beginner Japanese phrasebook can give you a perfect starting point for a cohesive understanding.

Remember, practice often and listen to native speakers to get the natural flow.

Small steps like these will build your confidence quickly!

Part 1: Casual Suggestions

1. デートしよう？ (Dēto shiyō?) – “Shall we go on a date?”

This is a simple, casual way to ask someone out by using the loanword “date” (デート, dēto).

“Shiyō” (しよう) is the volitional form of “suru” (to do), which makes it a friendly suggestion — basically, “let’s do a date.”

It’s easy to remember because it’s short and direct but still lighthearted.

It works well when you already have some friendly rapport.

Related phrases include “遊びに行こう？” (Asobi ni ikō?) meaning “Shall we hang out?”

Try keeping your tone upbeat and natural for the best effect!

2. 一緒にご飯行かない？ (Issho ni gohan ikanai?) – “Want to go eat together?”

This phrase is super natural and common among young people. It literally means “Won’t you go eat together with me?”

“Issho ni” (一緒に) means “together,” “gohan” (ご飯) means “meal,” and “ikanai” (行かない) is the negative form of “go,” used here as a polite invitation.

You can practice this one by inviting friends to meals first, then build up to romantic contexts.

A common mistake is making it too formal, which can feel stiff.

Example: “週末、一緒にご飯行かない？” (“Shūmatsu, issho ni gohan ikanai?” – “Want to go eat together this weekend?”)

This phrase is a gentle way to feel out the other person’s interest.

3. 付き合ってくれる？ (Tsukiatte kureru?) – “Will you go out with me?”

This is a straightforward phrase meaning “Will you date me?” or “Will you be my boyfriend/girlfriend?”

“Tsukiau” (付き合う) means “to date,” and “kureru” (くれる) implies the action is done for the speaker’s benefit, making it warm.

It’s casual but serious, so best used when you want to be clear.

Make sure to say it with sincerity.

Related phrase: “付き合ってください” (Tsukiatte kudasai) for a more polite request.

Confidence is key here; don’t rush it.

4. 今度、遊びに行かない？ (Kondo, asobi ni ikanai?) – “Wanna hang out sometime?”

This phrase is casual and flexible, good for inviting someone to spend time without pressure.

“Kondo” (今度) means “next time” or “sometime soon,” “asobi” (遊び) means “play” or “hang out,” and “ikanai” is the negative verb form used as a soft invitation.

It’s great for when you want to feel out interest without being direct about dating.

Keep your tone light and friendly.

Watch out for overusing “ikanai” in very formal situations.

Example: “今度、遊びに行かない？” (“Kondo, asobi ni ikanai?”)

5. 二人でどこか行かない？ (Futari de dokoka ikanai?) – “Shall we go somewhere, just the two of us?”

This phrase suggests a private outing, hinting at romantic interest without being too bold.

“Futari de” (二人で) means “the two of us,” “dokoka” (どこか) means “somewhere,” and “ikanai” is the invitation verb form.

It’s perfect for a gentle, intimate invitation.

Pronunciation tip: “futari” is “foo-ta-ree,” emphasizing the first syllable.

Try pairing this with specific places to make it feel more personal.

It’s a subtle and sweet way to ask someone out.

6. 今度、ご飯でもどう？ (Kondo, gohan demo dō?) – “How about a meal sometime?”

This phrase is casual and suggests a meal without pressure, using “demo” (でも) to soften the invitation.

“Dō” (どう) means “how about,” making it an open, polite question.

It’s easy to say and a great way to start a conversation about going out.

Don’t overthink the formality; it’s meant to be friendly.

Example usage: “今度、ご飯でもどう？”

Good for inviting someone new or someone you’re getting to know.

7. ちょっとデートしない？ (Chotto dēto shinai?) – “Wanna go on a little date?”

Adding “chotto” (ちょっと) means “a little,” making this phrase sound casual and slightly playful.

“Shinai” (しない) is the negative form used as an invitation, like “won’t you?”

It’s a cute way to ask, especially if you want to be lighthearted.

Perfect for those who want to sound friendly but with a hint of romance.

Mind the tone — too casual might confuse some listeners.

Great for close friends or people you’re already comfortable with.

8. 付き合ってもらえる？ (Tsukiatte moraeru?) – “Would you go out with me?”

This is another way to say “Will you go out with me?” but a bit softer and polite.

“Moraeru” (もらえる) implies receiving a favor, showing humility and warmth.

It’s often used when you want to be respectful but still casual.

Good for situations where you want to show sincerity without sounding too formal.

Try this after building some rapport.

It’s both endearing and clear.

Part 2: Polite & Formal Suggestions

9. お付き合いいただけますか？ (O-tsukiai itadakemasu ka?) – “Would you kindly go out with me?”

This phrase is very polite and respectful, great for formal or serious occasions.

“O-tsukiai” (お付き合い) adds honorific “o,” making “dating” more respectful.

“Itadakemasu ka” is a humble way to ask for a favor.

It’s perfect when you want to show genuine respect.

Use it when you want to be clear but polite, like in business or formal social settings.

Practice saying it slowly and sincerely.

10. お時間をいただけませんか？ (O-jikan o itadakemasen ka?) – “Could I have some of your time?”

This phrase is often used as a polite lead-in to asking someone out without directly saying “date.”

It literally means “May I have your time?” and shows respect.

It’s subtle and classy, great if you want to be indirect.

Great for first approaches or when you want to be careful with social context.

Don’t confuse it with casual phrases that might sound too blunt.

It’s a versatile and respectful option.

11. よろしければ、食事でもいかがですか？ (Yoroshikereba, shokuji demo ikaga desu ka?) – “If it’s alright, how about a meal?”

This is a very polite and gentle way to invite someone to eat together.

“Yoroshikereba” means “if it’s okay with you,” and “ikaga desu ka” is a polite way to ask “how about?”

It’s perfect for formal situations or when you want to show care.

Practice this to sound respectful but warm.

Avoid using it in very casual contexts where it may seem too stiff.

It works well in professional or new relationships.

12. もしよろしければ、デートしていただけませんか？ (Moshi yoroshikereba, dēto shite itadakemasen ka?) – “If it’s alright, would you go on a date with me?”

This is a very respectful and humble way to ask someone out.

“Moshi” means “if,” and “itadakemasen ka” is a polite request.

It’s suitable when you want to be very considerate and formal.

Great for situations where the relationship is new or formal.

Try it with a soft tone and gentle eye contact.

It shows both respect and seriousness.

13. お付き合いいただければ幸いです (O-tsukiai itadakereba saiwai desu) – “I would be happy if you would go out with me.”

This phrase adds a polite expression of happiness to your request.

“Saiwai desu” means “I would be happy,” making it warm and sincere.

It’s great for showing that you truly value the other person’s agreement.

Use it in formal or semi-formal contexts.

It’s a lovely phrase to soften the request and show your feelings.

Perfect for letter writing or careful verbal requests.

14. ご一緒にお出かけしませんか？ (Go-issho ni odekake shimasen ka?) – “Would you like to go out together?”

This is a respectful and slightly formal way to invite someone out.

“Odekake” means “going out,” and “shimasen ka” is the polite negative question form, used as an invitation.

It’s gentle and clear, great for new relationships.

Try to use a soft tone to sound inviting.

It’s more about spending time together than explicitly “dating,” so it’s versatile.

This phrase is a great bridge between casual and formal speech.

15. お時間があれば、食事に行きませんか？ (O-jikan ga areba, shokuji ni ikimasen ka?) – “If you have time, would you like to go eat?”

This phrase is polite and conditional, giving the other person space to decline.

“O-jikan ga areba” means “if you have time,” making it thoughtful.

Great for respectful invitations that don’t pressure.

It’s perfect for work colleagues or acquaintances.

Use a gentle, sincere tone.

It helps keep the atmosphere comfortable and open.

16. ご都合はいかがですか？ (Gotsugō wa ikaga desu ka?) – “How is your schedule?”

This question is a polite way to start planning a date without directly asking yet.

“Gotsugō” means “your convenience” or “schedule,” and “ikaga desu ka” means “how about?”

It’s great for showing respect for the other’s time.

Use it as a lead-in before a formal invitation.

Avoid sounding too formal; keep your tone soft.

This phrase helps build good communication and shows thoughtfulness.

Part 3: Very Casual / Native-like Expressions

17. 付き合わない？ (Tsukiawanai?) – “Wanna go out?”

This is a super casual and shortened version of “tsukiau.”

“Tsukiawanai” is the negative question form, which in casual speech becomes an invitation.

It’s commonly used among close friends or younger people.

Be mindful: too casual for formal settings.

Example: “今度、付き合わない？” (“Kondo, tsukiawanai?”)

It’s native-like and friendly but only for casual contexts.

18. デートしよ！ (Dēto shiyo!) – “Let’s go on a date!”

This phrase uses the volitional form “shiyo” to make a direct, energetic suggestion.

It’s informal and enthusiastic, perfect among close friends or couples.

It shows confidence and eagerness.

Make sure the timing and relationship fit this tone.

It’s a great go-to for casual, fun invitations.

Practice saying it with a smile!

19. 一緒に出かけよっか？ (Issho ni dekakeyokka?) – “Shall we go out together?”

This is a very natural and native-sounding invitation.

“Dekakeyokka” is a casual volitional form combined with a soft question particle “ka.”

It’s friendly and easy to say.

Best used with friends or people you’re close with.

It feels warm and spontaneous.

Try using it when you want to sound relaxed and natural.

20. 今度飲みに行かない？ (Kondo nomi ni ikanai?) – “Wanna grab a drink sometime?”

This phrase is casual and common among adults.

“Nomi” (飲み) means “drinking,” often implying social drinking together.

It’s a great way to invite someone out for drinks in a laid-back way.

Be careful with tone; it can be too casual for new acquaintances.

Use it when you want to keep things light and fun.

Example: “今度飲みに行かない？”

21. 付き合ってくれない？ (Tsukiatte kurenai?) – “Won’t you go out with me?”

This phrase is a casual but heartfelt request.

“Kurenai” is the informal negative question form, used here as an invitation.

It’s often used among young people or close peers.

Be sure to use a sincere tone.

It’s less formal but shows genuine feeling.

It’s a very relatable phrase for native speakers.

22. 付き合ってほしいんだけど (Tsukiatte hoshii n da kedo) – “I want you to go out with me.”

This phrase expresses a desire directly but softly, using “hoshii” (want).

“N da kedo” softens the statement and adds a natural tone.

It feels informal and personal.

Great for expressing your feelings honestly.

Try it when you want to be clear but gentle.

It’s a lovely way to open your heart in conversation.

Concluding Thought

Asking someone out in Japanese is as much about tone and context as the words themselves. Exploring these 22 phrases gives you a toolbox for many situations, from casual to formal and playful to serious.

Remember, the best phrase is the one that feels natural to you and suits your relationship with the other person.

With a little courage and these warm expressions, you’re ready to make a genuine connection — in Japanese and beyond!